Parenting While at Penn and Graduate Student Life

By Esther H. Ra, Ed.D.

Last semester, a graduate student who I had advised asked as she was leaving, if I knew any information about parenting resources for graduate students on Penn campus. As I spoke to the student, it occurred to me that in order for the student to progress in their career search or development, they had a great need for other important resources to help them along in their journey to function as a successful student at Penn. As a former Penn graduate student, who also had a family by the time I defended my dissertation, I empathized greatly with this student. I knew very well the struggle of balancing parenthood and graduate student life, particularly on Penn campus, and remembered the feeling of wanting to be connected to a network of Penn parents. For graduate students who may also be juggling parenthood, this post is dedicated to you! Since I was a graduate student, many new resources have come to existence and there are excellent opportunities and communities you can become a part of so that you don’t feel that you’re journeying alone. Not only did you embark on learning and “mastering” subject matters, but you have the privilege and adventure of parenting another life. It IS possible to do both with some help. I commend you for seeking resources that can improve your graduate student life as a parent. Here are some resources that may be of help:

The Family Resource Center at Penn: https://familycenter.upenn.edu/about-us

Join their email list learn about resources that Penn has to offer. The site can connect you to Penn parent networks, neighborhood networks, as well as national sites that can direct you to parenting resources. It’s also a hub for knowing what benefits you have as a parent while studying at Penn. There are also amenities such as a lactation room, a family lounge, a reading room, as well as nap space for kids, and books and toys. It is a wealth of information and resources and this should be your first stop at Penn for parenting resources!

Emergency Backup Childcare: https://familycenter.upenn.edu/resources-support/child-care

Every parent wants to know what childcare help they can get when an emergency occurs. Who can take care of your children should they have a snow day and you have an important meeting to attend? Penn has a resource that can cover you for backup care should you need it.

Care.com Free Resource through Penn https://pennfamilycenter.care.com/

Penn also has a wonderful Care.com resource where families can sign up to find childcare for their home. This resource can be customized for local care and Penn helps with a free membership to Care.com while you are a student.

Lactation and Baby Changing Stations

https://familycenter.upenn.edu/resources-support/lactation-resources

Are you always searching for a place to nurse or feed your baby? What about a place to change their diaper? It’s always a struggle for parents of babies and toddlers to find a safe, clean place to do what is already a tough job: nursing and changing a wiggling baby. Not only does the Family Resource Center at Penn have a lactation room, but Penn is a very lactation friendly campus with rooms located all around campus. Many of bathrooms in several of the buildings on campus also have baby friendly changing spaces.

Grants for Ph.D. Students with Dependents: https://familycenter.upenn.edu/grants

Penn also has a couple l funded family grants, specifically for PhD students. One is a Family Grant and the other Is a Dependent Health Insurance Grant. Read about the guidelines and see if you might be able to qualify. The grant cycle opens on August 27th to submit applications. If you think that these might be of interest, you will need to get in gear with all submission materials ready very soon!

PennCard & Campus Services:

https://familycenter.upenn.edu/resources-support/penncard-and-campus-services

Did you know the PennCard enables your spouse and children to access several amenities on campus? However, they each need to obtain their OWN Penn Card, which can easily be done through the PennCard Center: http://cms.business-services.upenn.edu/penncard/. The PennCard will give your spouse and children access to museums, Penn transit services, and recreational facilities.

I hope that helps with navigating family life as a graduate student! It’s not an easy road, but it’s a fun one when you have the right resources at your fingertips. Happy parenting!

Treat the job search like a class.

Jingy Yen, Career Counselor

When I was in college, I had trouble figuring out how to balance my time between my commitments, classes, and looking for jobs. I knew I had to sit down and think about applying for things, but after a long day of exams, meetings and projects this seemed almost impossible. My career advisor gave me some advice that I constantly pass on to my students – treat the job search like a class. By doing this, I was able to compartmentalize and the job search didn’t seem like a looming thing that I stressed about all day. To ensure successful implementation of this strategy, there are two easy steps to follow:

  1. Set aside designated time

Schedule time every week to work on your job, internship or graduate school search. This seems obvious, but the most important thing is to not schedule things over it. Treat it like a class by making it consistent and not something you can easily miss.

  1. Don’t worry about it the rest of the time

You know you will work on “career stuff” at a certain time every week, so don’t worry about it the rest of the week. This helped me tremendously because I didn’t feel the constant pressure of having to look for something when I knew I would have time to work on it later. Let yourself have some time off!

Of course there will be times that you have to do things outside of the designated time, like answer time sensitive emails or go to an interview (kind of like homework!). I found that by setting aside the time earlier in the week, I was able to proactively schedule these things, be more prepared and feel more organized throughout the entire process.

I’ve used this strategy for many other things in my life – so it doesn’t work just for career related things! Anytime you have a stressful issue that seems to take over everything, this can be a way to tackle it one step at a time.

Prepping for the Rest of the Semester

Kevin Haines, Associate Director

Now that the Fall semester has started and you have a few weeks of class already completed, it’s time to look at the rest of your semester and map out important dates and events. This includes planning for the Spring semester (I know, we’re not even at midterms yet and I’m already talking about NEXT semester), summer 2019, and for some, graduation! Below, I’ve compiled a list of items you might want to consider reviewing that can help put your mind at ease. Some are just “food for thought” and “don’t forgets” while others are essential. Take a look and see if more than a few of these apply to you.

  • Adjusting to classes 

By now you’ve been to quite a few classes and have reviewed all your syllabi (hopefully!). Take a look at all the assignments, quizzes, homework, and tests that will be given in each of your classes and mark the due dates on your calendar. It’s always better to have more reminders than none so that you don’t forget anything. If you’re finding that the course is difficult, talk to your professor or TA. They can help you figure out what you’re struggling with most and give suggestions on how to succeed. Before you know it, it will be Fall break, and then only a few classes will remain in the semester.

  • Research courses for next semester (if you haven’t already) 

What? But this semester basically just started! Yes, that’s true, but it’s always best to get a jumpstart on next semester’s courses. For many majors, courses are already mapped out ahead of time for each semester, however, that’s not always the case. Start looking at course options for next semester so that you have an idea of what you need/want to take and aren’t running around last minute trying to get into a course that’s already full. This should help reduce some stress knowing that you know what you’ll be studying in the Spring.

  • Check-in with your advisor 

At this point, you may not necessarily need to consult with your advisor about classes, but it’s a good idea to still check-in with them. You can talk about current courses, next semester’s courses, study abroad/internship opportunities, or simply how you’re feeling about the semester. Keep them in the loop of what’s going on in your life if you think there is something important they should know. They are there to help, and so is Career Services!

  • Get your resume updated/prep for interviews and OCR 

While many Penn career fairs have already happened for this current semester, you can still stop by Career Services walk-in hours or make appointments to go over your resume and cover letter. We are here Monday-Friday, 9-5pm, so even if you have a last minute question or concern, check walk-in hour times, schedule an appointment, or send us an email. While OCR is coming up, it’s not the only time you can find a job or internship. Job/internships are posted all the time. In the past, some students found something as late as May. While for most people that is not ideal, it’s still a possibility. So, if you haven’t found anything just yet (it’s still early!), just know that there will be plenty of opportunities coming up. Add OCR to your calendar and get yourself ready to interview. It can be stressful at times, but with proper planning, and talking to us at Career Services, we’ll help you figure out a plan. We also help with mock interviews, so if you’re feeling nervous about an actual interview you have, come practice with us. Sometimes all you need is some constructive criticism (and praise!) to help you ace your interview.

  • Strategize for study abroad or summer abroad internships 

Looking to leave the US for a semester and study at a different university or with a specific program? Studying abroad is an incredible experience where you will be able to immerse yourself in another culture while taking courses in a different language (or not!) and learn in a new way. You should start the process a semester before you want to go abroad, but make sure you meet with Penn Abroad in time, as deadlines for Spring 2019 are coming to a close very soon. There are programs for all schools/majors. Additionally, Penn Abroad can help you intern abroad. Be sure to check their website for important updates and information sessions. Schedule an appointment with an advisor after doing some initial research on where you would like to go (and whether or not you are eligible for that particular semester). Represent Penn, abroad!

  • Begin networking with alumni (LinkedIn!) 

Now is the perfect time to start networking and getting to know the people in the career you see yourself in soon. LinkedIn is an excellent tool to learn about Penn alum, what they do, and where they work. LinkedIn allows you to search alum using keywords and locations, so begin searching! Sometimes, you may recognize people that you know or read about and messaging them is only a click away. Don’t be afraid to send someone (or a few people) a message introducing yourself and asking to chat with them. Should they respond, try setting up an informational interview with them to understand how they got to where they were and what their experiences were/are like. Definitely do not start your email out asking them for a job, but rather advice on moving forward in your career. You may only get a conversation or email from them, which is still great, but who knows, in the end, you may end up landing yourself an internship or job!

  • Update family and friends on what’s going on in your life 

Make sure you are checking in with family and friends. School can and is stressful, so sometimes you can go days, even weeks, without talking to family members or close friends. Remember to keep them updated on your life as it is important to hear from them as well and learn about what’s going on in their lives. School is very important, but so is balancing it with your personal life. Let family know how your semester is going and what you have to look forward to in the coming weeks/semester. They know you have a busy schedule, so taking time, even just for a phone call, can put a big smile on their face!

  • Take care of YOU!

The most important thing to take care of this semester, and always, is yourself! Life is ever changing and always busy and it’s easy to let self-care fall to the side. Be sure you are remembering to set aside time for yourself, whether it’s a few hours a week, a full day, or every day. Watch a movie, listen to music, go for a run, eat ice cream, have vegan food, catch up with a friend, paint, sing, explore the city, etc. The list goes on and on. Just remember that YOU are important and that this includes your health and mental health. Take care of yourself always.

How To Look More Awake

by Jingy Yen, Career Adviser

Before moving to Philadelphia and starting my job at Penn, I had a side gig doing bridal and special event makeup. I’ve always loved playing with makeup and trying the newest products, but it always felt very separate from my professional work as a career advisor. I’ve recently begun to realize that it doesn’t have to be! Although I spend most of my time advising on the best search strategies and fine tuning resumes, I also get many questions from students about professional attire and appearance, especially for interviews. So here are some tips and tricks I’ve curated through my experience working as both a career development professional AND a makeup artist:

How to look more awake:

By far the biggest problem I have when doing my makeup before an interview is figuring out how to look more refreshed and awake. This is my 3 pronged, sure fire way to look like you had a full nights sleep and are super enthusiastic about the job:

1. Mascara. If you are going to apply just one item, this would be it. Try a brown mascara for a more subtle look, especially if you have lighter hair. Pro tip: don’t pump your mascara wand, instead spin it around in the tube to get the product on the brush. Pumping it will dry out the product faster!

2. Under eye concealer. Cover up those bags! Use an orange based concealer to cover any blue or purple areas. Then, apply a concealer that is a shade lighter than your normal skin tone to brighten up the area. Focus the concealer in the area underneath the bag, not on the actual bag itself. Check out this video for some great techniques:

3. Use a nude or white eyeliner on your lower lashline, instead of black. Black tends to close the eye while or nude will help make it look bigger and more awake.

Be wary of Instagram trends

Okay, I’m guilty of this one. What can I say, I’m a fan of a thick brow and some intense highlighting action. But what I’ve learned from taking pictures for my makeup Instagram is that what looks good in a photo doesn’t always look good in person. You may look beautifully glowing in that perfectly angled snap, but it comes off as an oil slick to the employer sitting in front of you. Less is usually more in this case. This is why you always hear that you should wear dark colored suits with not a lot of patterns. You don’t want to be remembered for what you are wearing, and this is the same philosophy for makeup. So step away from the contouring and false lashes, and remember that neutrals are your friend!

You don’t have to wear makeup

This is one of the most common questions I get from students. Do I have to wear makeup? NO! You can wear as much or as little as you want, as long as it’s not distracting and still professional. The interview is not the time to try something drastically different from what you normally do. Definitely don’t feel any pressure to dress up or look a certain way. This brings me to my next point…

Above all, do what makes you feel the most confident
This is my philosophy on all things makeup and beauty. If you normally don’t wear makeup and know that you would be self-conscious about it, then don’t wear makeup to the interview. If you normally wear a full face of makeup and feel the most put together when you do, then rock it to the interview. It’s all about what is going to make you feel the most confident and sure about yourself. This attitude will come through in the way you talk about yourself and the answers to interview questions. This may seem like I’m telling you to ignore all my previous advice, but I think it’s more about finding the right balance and becoming the most polished version of yourself.

Permission to Take a Break

Barbara Hewitt, Senior Associate Director

Keyboard with Coffee Break button, work concept
Keyboard with Coffee Break button, work concept

Let’s face it – it’s been a really busy fall for just about everybody, but especially those of you who have been doing what sometimes can seem like the Herculean task of being both a Penn student and also looking for a post-graduate or internship position. (And that’s not even mentioning the hours that most of you devote to clubs, activities, work study jobs, sports and many other endeavors!) We just finished a Career Services staff meeting and the career advisors uniformly felt that this has been one of the busiest semesters we can remember. With the move of on-campus internship recruiting to the fall, we not only met (and coordinated interviews for!) hundreds of seniors pursuing post graduate options, but also many juniors and sophomores seeking internships. There certainly hasn’t been much down time for either staff or students this fall.

We’ve heard from many students who have happily finalized their plans and have been able to step back from their job and internship searches to now focus on the many other things on their “to do” lists, but we’ve also been hearing from students feeling high levels of stress and fatigue at this point in the semester. It can be demoralizing to devote extensive energy and effort to attending employer events, writing cover letters, and donning suits for interviews, just to feel that it was all for naught if you haven’t yet landed an opportunity about which you are excited.

As I watched the Presidential election results come in late Tuesday night, I experienced what felt like a similar sense of stress. We’ve all been “living” the campaign on a daily basis for more than a year and many people had strong feelings about who they hoped would win. While some were elated with the outcome, many others came away with a sense of devastation. In both the election and our job searches, no matter how hard we work, we can’t guarantee the outcome, which can lead to even higher levels of stress, as “working harder” cannot always guarantee the desired outcome. A sense of uncertainty was certainly heightened for many people this week.

If you are experiencing this stress, either due to career related activities, the election, or some other circumstance, we in Career Services urge you to take the time to care for yourself. With the end of the semester almost upon us, give yourself permission to step away and take a break from job search activities for a few weeks, focus on your academics, and renew your energy and spirit. Use the Thanksgiving and semester breaks to reinvigorate yourself, and start 2017 with a new sense of optimism and energy to begin a new chapter.

And, of course, when you are ready to begin again, come see us. We are here to support you in exploring and achieving your career goals.